((My Dad and Me))In Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird, Atticus Finch says to his daughter Scout, “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it [1]" (36). Although this quote is not meant for literal interpretation, Second Life provided my fellow classmates and me with the opportunity to do just that, to become our role models and see the world through their eyes. Not only were we turned into their physical persona, but also actively participated in living life as them. Their past became our present and through their experiences and beliefs, we were able to penetrate and “explore other realms of thought [2]” that we never thought possible (Danielle Oxford 10:00).
My father never told “me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it [3]” (Clarence Kelland). Thus, portraying him in second life proved to be quite satisfying. I have always admired his loving nature and constant drive to accomplish everything he desires along with his unending enthusiasm for and devotion to his family, friends and community. He is very intelligent and a thriving lawyer while he still possesses an undying conviction to his faith. Not only is he courageous and successful, but he is also gentle, charismatic and inspiring. He always encouraged me to follow my dreams, no matter the cost. With all of these qualities I wished to emulate in mind, I set out on my adventure to create him mind, body, and soul in Second Life.
((Me sitting at the computer communicating through Second Life))As I sat on my computer and opened Second Life, I was warped into another time, another place, and another world. Forming my Father into an Avatar was like watching him be reborn within the computer screen and then evolving into a new self. Each change I made to his personal features made him seem even more alive and I began to feel a connection to him like I had never felt before. Our souls were united and our hearts beat as one whilst we unanimously molded each other. Although it was frustrating at first to not be able to capture his exact image, I was able to successfully portray my father, kilt and all, in the end. A great sense of accomplishment and anticipation flowed through my veins as my father and I made our way to Orientation Island.
((My Avatar of my father, Hubert Oxford III))
People say that one never truly knows a person until he takes a walk in his shoes. Although I have known my father my entire life and have been an active participant in his, I never completely understood him until I was forced to become him and leap into his mind. At first, living as my father was incredibly strange; however, with each step came a stronger sense of curiosity and understanding. With me learning how to instruct my Father to do things such as speak and walk, it was as if we had reversed our roles. I had essentially taken on his job of teacher and provider, while he had become the student. Learning to drive and fly were other great adventures within themselves. Each represented a special time my father and I had shared together, so the experience became even more real and important. Although we struggled with both at first, each proved to be incredibly useful to the Second Life experience when perfected. As we took flight and headed towards UT Island, I realized that only in a virtual world would one be able to travel at the speed of light to a world of their very own choosing. Arriving at the UT SL Island was very similar to a homecoming. Since we both were students at The University of Texas at Austin, this island linked my father and me even further together. The UT tower and other surrounding buildings provided a familiar setting in a new and alien environment. Although the island was configured to look like the campus, it was still foreign and exciting to explore. Considering we were the only people there, the island was small and got lonely after a while; however, once everyone else arrived, things got interesting.
When all the other Avatars ventured onto the island, it was thrilling to meet them and to begin to converse amongst ourselves. Through discovery learning, we were able to determine more about each other’s identities and actually grasp the concepts of Second Life. Next, we flew over the wall to our own domain and proceeded to our assigned groups for discussion. During the Avatar conversations, I became Hubert Oxford III. My father and I were one. His thoughts were mine, and mine were his. It was as if I was stuck in a trancelike state between fiction and reality. It was bizarre communicating with my classmates, who were sitting right beside me, through the computer; however, knowing they had shared similar experiences during the creation of their respective role models, only made me feel a stronger bond forming amongst us. Our goal was to participate fully in the discussions while still imitating our characters.
(((Me typing during one of the Avatar Dialogues.))
The conversations between us were very insightful, but in some cases progressed a little slowly. It was hard expressing exactly what I wanted to say while reading others responses due to the fact that everyone was communicating at once. Also, it was difficult to totally understand the meaning of others suggestions because unlike in a face-to-face conversation, we were not able to observe each other’s gestures or tone of voice. By taking on someone else’s identity, no one knew who anyone else was and therefore no preconceived judgments were formed. I believe that communicating as Avatars dressed as our role models enabled us to become our characters and not focus on our own personal beliefs and ideas. This way was more authentic than discussing our role model’s views as ourselves in our everyday clothes and added the aspect of inspiration through communicating as leaders. While I was speaking as my Father, my thoughts flowed differently and I began to respect his opinions more and fuse them with my own.
Throughout each of the dialogues, everyone’s thoughts gushed out of him as if from somewhere deep within his role model’s heart. By observing the opinions of the various role models represented, I was presented with numerous different ways to look at leadership that I had never considered before. The first group discussion focused mainly on what leadership was and the part that it had played in each of our hero’s lives, while the second group discussion was centered around the relationship between leadership and diversity.
(((First Group Discussion))Several Key elements such as passion, drive, and character seemed to guide the conversation and lead us in producing even more insightful ideas on what being a leader entails. We continually stressed the importance of a leader’s “ability to make everyone feel united towards a goal…and to want to pursue it together [4]” while still maintaining a courteous relationship with his supporters (Danielle Oxford [9:21]). Also, a great emphasis was put on a leader’s ability to form his own opinions without conforming to those of society and to “ express and live these ideas [5]” in his everyday life (Danielle Oxford [9:12]). Furthermore, from the second conversation we were able to see that leadership and diversity are closely interlinked.
((Second Group Discussion))“Leaders are able to promote diversity through their actions and words [6]” (Danielle Oxford [9:46]). They are capable of seeing things from another’s point of view and empathize and show compassion for their positions. Another idea that appeared frequently throughout this discussion was that the more experiences with diversity that a leader has had in his life, the more he “will be able to relate to (others) and understand their situations [7]” (Danielle Oxford [9:56]). I also came to the conclusion that a leader does not wait for diversity to find him, he “seeks opportunities to experience diversity” and in doing so “go(es) outside of (his) comfort zone (to) break barriers [8]” for everyone (Danielle Oxford ([9:59]). By participating in such dialogue and listening to others, my classmates and I ultimately took on leadership roles ourselves. We were able to connect through the expression of our ideas and combine our personal beliefs with those of our role models to develop a unique integration of thought and inspiration.
Additionally, our Avatar chat paralleled Walter Jackson Bate’s definition of the sympathetic imagination. He states in “The Sympathetic Imagination in Eighteenth-Century English Criticism” that in order to truly understand an object, one must “actually (enter) into the object…to secure a momentary but complete identification with it [9]” (144-46). Thus, by dwelling as my father in Second Life, I was essentially taking part in his existence. As I delved into my father’s mind and produced his definition of leadership, we became a cohesive entity of expression. Because of this feeling of harmony, I believe I was more successful in translating my father’s leadership experience into words and relating this knowledge to how he acted as a leader throughout his life. Although I did not always interact in the discussion exactly how he would, I think I was able to capture the nature of his spirit and impart his beliefs to others. It was exhilarating to “throw (my) soul into the body of another man, and be at once possessed of his sentiments, adopt his passions, and rise to all the functions and feelings of his situation [10]” (Bate 144-46).
(((Seeing the World through my father's eyes.))I instantly was able to connect to my father’s outlook on life and understand how his experiences have formed his views and beliefs. I found a new respect and love for him and finally appreciated him for who he was. While I have always known that my father and I are two very different and distinctive people, this experience through Second Life showed me that in fact, we actually had a lot in common. By trying to think how he would think, my innermost thoughts resurfaced and I was able to simultaneously interpret and separate the ones that we both shared. It was really quite gratifying to realize that someone who I looked up to and admired so much was so much like me and had already had such a huge impact on my life. I now believe that the same is true for all role models. People try to become and emulate those that they admire because they see some unique part of themselves within their role models and only hope that they will someday amount to who they are and follow in their footsteps. Thus, we all have the potential to accomplish great things just like are role models have done before us and I owe this realization to Second Life.
In conclusion, this encounter with Second Life not only taught me more about my father, but also taught me a little something about myself. This newly formed relationship is reciprocal and unique. Just as Katherine Mansfield said, "By understanding myself, I better understand others and by understanding others, I better understand myself [11]”. Jumping into my father’s skin and observing the world through his eyes, provided me with more insight into who he was and allowed me to catch a glimpse at the bond that exists between us. Although our encounters were merely in a virtual world, I was still ignited with a sense of understanding and esteem for my Father that I believe will never be put out. I only hope that I will one day be able to live the kind of life that he has lived while benefiting from all of the leadership capabilities he has endowed upon me. At the end of the day, Hubert Oxford III is my father, and I am his daughter and I am satisfied knowing that this is the most extraordinary and irreplaceable connection present in the world.
((Me and my Dad bonded forever))Word Count: 1,801
Photo Citations:
Dad and Me, Neches River Festival:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyVoiBb8xkSowGBF2x2eRPJnn-wq-CEZb-4MTrfVH3sSVcu3mxfPXfAOdXpS_KbZ0tzxR9BgIKL2v1LmDNJWx7-8GPTrRI9Utp-P-8XNQRtgQOdQEVNyonXSDO2P4OpQ92eba11P9XFlg/s1600-h/n1516410112_30071503_3485.jpg
Danielle, Crystal Avatar Discussions:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLKzJsLN76Tv8Walayk6E3rsMiwzCZSjq3SkQhJR3Xi_NrcuYC58erUbW2HGSY8wGAOlgg1PfKTZtrumlDnWVCPpfmGvaXQ7jCLtjG8bjQPQPyLzmc8SxCXFC8oLzwQizSmNCDU7GBHQ8/s1600-h/JuliePDanielleCrystal.jpg
Avatar1:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYdFqj2SHRhtHMxSjFYR1I3TIDWeEkJ1z3PsFYxqSrlNhbwfhGi_TdBnGaIg-NHENmOg0Oz8vaHVRhn8lKrkdEz0OQtMVKTft5ceB3b9YDyMCG5ZpsvLb-p6VtZE9m2eRHrkW2zsk6cgI/s1600-h/Rm1_003.bmp
Danielle, Crystal, Ryan Avatar Disussions:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyJw2UueFtaxQZjaRVJFk5znuVIWtYAxg1401EBb_cNzEbinxedI3tjv6Jb2bCn3pArR5Hy7qCH6_Kr2Bj5BbBz-NCDCNKJcJDUtnAS70RQyE1-9WwvyeQXyCbXxX-B21ln1_R7EeFBWI/s1600-h/DanielleCrystalRyan.jpg
Group 1 Discussion:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn72isX8NBHQVzDCiPQZrudTdQrrDPYpghyphenhyphen9zYC1xF5jn5dxD0W5thxtN3MZ2lnB60UwlV33asNgdTJCDmJNIEd69pePPr84cywg5H9MyDR-TxjRAgQcwOJOUSFQaZp1t4urHYjLcOz4U/s1600-h/1.jpg
Group 2 Discussion:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgum9amV5_IJIN94BOWnMBd2t0zHO3R-_Cd4ZJ3eJjNurwCduxdmo2aHsVh-3FwLn3oFH4q50F0JHEBuIsefwr4OVOyDGo145N8IwuedP7UDADK65gngDQJfRIEND2e-Qzcw-k6DMP1CA8/s1600-h/5B.jpg
Avatar2:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxzleYZnXrBknwzgxgUbE7OE9CEv3CzmETr4LeRnkaqjgoIWIDhUyD34RmKQJmoGA2S3uofzw2T8wUhRGi_1-sERwaL8A-TwaA2xxN4PmyidR_CDRPCS0sNHq-QZ817Wd5CfIqr71BCfg/s1600-h/Rm1_002.bmp
Dad and Me, Beaver Creek 2004:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpcclUZ0HCRMRfMLb_B7RvHnskzEBhU4-osBsgL7i-QmlZKhIbipzhuP90AlOgNdySd7qXFEnka-0eE9qRi7PsIru-wWg9fNrZ2ExmCB_OTg3QNhR6pGqEPocqlG0x_fod3wh2h803BNs/s1600-h/img680.jpg
Text Citations:
[1]- Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird (New York: J. B. Lippincott, 1960), 36.
[2]- Danielle Oxford, Avatar Discussion 2, Group 5, [10:00].
[3]- Clarence Kelland. Steve Brunkhorst, “15 Unforgettable Father Quotes.” Ezine Articles, http://ezinearticles.com/?15-Unforgettable-Father-Quotes&id=141974 (accessed October 16, 2007).
[4]- Danielle Oxford, Avatar Discussion 1, Group 1, [9:21].
[5]- Danielle Oxford, Avatar Discussion 1, Group 1, [9:12].
[6]- Danielle Oxford, Avatar Discussion 2, Group 5, [9:46].
[7]- Danielle Oxford, Avatar Discussion 2, Group 5, [9:56].
[8]- Danielle Oxford, Avatar Discussion 2, Group 5, [9:59].
[9]- “The Sympathetic Imagination in Eighteenth-Century English Criticism” by Walter Jackson Bate ELH, Vol. 12, No. 2 (Jun., 1945), pp. 144-164. http://www.cwrl.utexas.edu/~bump/sympathetic%20imagination.html
[10]- “The Sympathetic Imagination in Eighteenth-Century English Criticism” by Walter Jackson Bate ELH, Vol. 12, No. 2 (Jun., 1945), pp. 144-164. http://www.cwrl.utexas.edu/~bump/sympathetic%20imagination.html
[11]- Katherine Mansfield. Dr. Mardy, “Dr. Mardy's Quotes of the Week -- January 9-15, 2005.” http://64.233.167.104/search?q=cache:KhDjaqx1CsUJ:www.chiasmus.com/archive/msg00210.html+katherine+mansfield+By+understanding+myself,+I+better+understand+others+and+by+understanding+others,+I+better+understand+myself&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=us (accessed October 16, 2007).
Appendix:
Avatar Discussion 1, Group 1:
[9:08] You: Hello Lantz. What do you think a leader is?
[9:10] You: I think a leader is capable of leading others while still maintaining a respectful relationship with them.
[9:11] Lantz Pichot: Hey. A leader is someone who can connect with people and convey their feelings.
[9:12] Basic Chair: Right click me and choose 'Sit Here' to sit down
[9:12] You: Also, I think it is important that a leader knows what he believes and does not conform to society but expresses and lives these ideas and values.
[9:12] Lantz Pichot: That, I definitely agree with.
[9:13] Lantz Pichot: Leaders are people who dare to step out.
[9:13] You: I agree that connection is very important in any leader/follower relationship. ONLY CONNECT!
[9:13] Latte Littlething: Yes, I agree Alaina. I think individualismm is key. A leader accepts not only his own character, but the character of others.
[9:13] You: Yes, and are not afraid to do the unknown or be persecuted for it.
[9:13] Lantz Pichot: Haha, yeah, hammer your visions into unity while you're at it. :)
[9:13] Lantz Pichot: But actually, "hammering your visions" is pretty important.
[9:14] You: Individualism is very important but also being able to relate to others is very important. Someone cannot be too individualistic that they are unapproachable...
[9:14] Latte Littlething: Individualism is defined by passion, passion for life, for adventure, for discovery and exploration.
[9:14] Lantz Pichot: Leaders take stands on topics, and people follow because they're so confident.
[9:15] Nepal Bergamasco: Confidence is important because once a leader starts something, he must do everything to execute his goal
[9:16] You: I agree leaders should never quit, but I also think that a leader’s flaws make him more human. People don’t always want to follow a perfect man.
[9:16] You: A true leader can overcome any obstacle or flaw and turn it into a positive situation and aspect of their character.
[9:16] Nepal Bergamasco: You're right, a leader also must be human
[9:16] Latte Littlething: Well yes, confidence comes with an acceptance of your own passion. A leader pursues his/ her passion without any interest in the accomplishment. The interest drives their actions.
[9:16] Nepal Bergamasco: must*
[9:17] You: I think Passion is the most important aspect of a leader also. Without passion, a leader is not a leader.
[9:18] You: A leader must also take interest in his followers. He must be able to listen to them and put their needs and wants into action.
[9:18] Nepal Bergamasco: Yes, passion is the driving force in any leader.
[9:18] Latte Littlething: I always say. "Il faut aller voir". We must go and see for ourselves. This means that in pursuing our passions, we must become proactive, not observers, but active partcipants.
[9:18] Nepal Bergamasco: It's important to know the passion of your people as well if you are to become a leader
[9:18] Latte Littlething: A leader insists on involvement.
[9:19] Nepal Bergamasco: Once you connect with your people, and feel what they feel, only then will you see the real need in a group of people
[9:19] You: I think charisma and character are also two very important attributes of a leader.
[9:20] Nepal Bergamasco: Empathy is important in leadership.
[9:20] You: I agree and compassion.
[9:20] Latte Littlething: I agree Nepal, recognizing the individuality among your crewmembers creates a feeling of community.
[9:21] Nepal Bergamasco: The importance of vision in a leader is important
[9:21] Nepal Bergamasco: A leader should see ahead.
[9:21] Nepal Bergamasco: Look at the big picture
[9:21] You: The ability to make everyone feel united towards a goal
[9:22] Latte Littlething: I find that if I surround myself with a crew or team full of their own passions, I don't have to encourage them to work. An "esprit de corps" emerges. Everyone jumps on board and words as a body.
[9:22] You: and to want to pursue it together is key.
[9:23] You: I agree. A leader needs a group of supportive individuals that are just as passionate as he is or he will not be able to accomplish much.
[9:23] Nepal Bergamasco: Latte, I agree. I see a body with the same passion just like a boat, with all its passengers paddling, with the leader in the front to lead the direction.
[9:23] You: Again, I stress that a respectful relationship between all members of an involved party is so important.
[9:24] You: I also believe that a leader needs a personable side. He needs to be able to relate to others, to make jokes, and to not take himself too seriously.
[9:24] Latte Littlething: Yes, a unifying passion for life in all aspects, family, work, discovery, creates a balance on a level with which all in the crew can relate. Then, there are unifying feelings and experiences with which people may relate to each other.
[9:24] Nepal Bergamasco: Alaina, you're right because with respect, we get rid of the things that might complicate eachother's relationship
[9:25] Latte Littlething: Yes Nepal, a boat of discovery.
[9:25] Nepal Bergamasco: The little things always matter
[9:25] Nepal Bergamasco: yeah
[9:25] You: The little things are the foundation to accomplishing great things.
[9:25] You: A leader also needs experience.
[9:25] Nepal Bergamasco: It's important that a leader pays attention to little things, details
[9:25] Latte Littlething: Upon which, the shipmates explore themselves as well as each other
[9:26] Latte Littlething: What kind of details do you mean Nepal?
[9:26] You: They need to have encountered various situations and outcomes to truly know how to handle anything.
[9:26] Latte Littlething: I think you refer to the magic of the moments.
[9:27] Nepal Bergamasco: Details like, how each member in a group interact with the rest. A leader should pay attention to the smallest things like, how does one member of your group feel today?
[9:27] Latte Littlething: A leader should be able to recognize the magical moments of his/her life.
[9:27] You: I know my experiences in the air force truly made me a better leader because I was put in a situation I had never been in before and was forced to find myself and support those around me.
[9:27] You: It is the moments that make history.
[9:28] Latte Littlething: Oh, yes. The quirks and idiosyncracies of the crew.
[9:28] Latte Littlething: These are what defines them.
[9:28] Nepal Bergamasco: Alaina: describe one trait in a leader you feel you have had whhile in the air force
[9:28] Nepal Bergamasco: and tell us how it affected your experience there
[9:29] Latte Littlething: New situations induce new chances for exploration. They draw the attention away from the self and focus energies on others.
[9:30] Nepal Bergamasco: Latte: can you expand on that?
[9:31] You: Well just in general, teamwork was key. In the midst of a war, it was important to realize that I could depend on others because we were all there for the same reason. I cannot really think of any one experience that truly defined my time there but I was introduced to so many opportunities at being a leader such as serving as a captain and Judge Advocate.
[9:31] Nepal Bergamasco: Aliana: So teamwork and the feeling of having your back supported by your members all the time is important
[9:32] Nepal Bergamasco: That is true, but a leader must not forget that initiative is what the whole group needs
[9:33] Latte Littlething: Yes, I think what Alaina refers to is the moments in life that spur a realization of the insignificance of the individual. Happiness occurs when one ceases to focus inwardly, and begins to focus on the love for life and relationships with others. This creates a well rounded being.
[9:33] You: Yes, I would say so. Although, I know I can accomplish things on my own, accomplishing things is a group effort. It is up to the leader to initiate the goal and the followers to help make it happen.
[9:34] Latte Littlething: I send my crewmembers home once every six months for this purpose. To spend time with families, pursue other interests.
[9:35] Latte Littlething: When they are with me on my voyages, I encourage them to pursue their various other interests as well.
[9:35] You: It is always important to have a strong support group at home. I have learned that my family will always be there for me, through the good and the bad.
[9:35] Latte Littlething: And I find that their enthusiasm grows by leaps and bounds in this manner.
[9:35] Nepal Bergamasco: Latte: I see now that a leader must put emphasis on the exploration of each member's inner self
[9:35] Latte Littlething: Yes!
[9:35] You: A cultured person will most likely be a more successful leader because they know how to relate to others.
[9:35] Nepal Bergamasco: Alaina: Yes, a strong sense of family and community is important
[9:36] Latte Littlething: This emphasis creates a basis for personal relationships.
[9:36] Cameron Reinard shouts: until otherwise shown, we can
[9:36] Latte Littlething: Upon which, real power as a team rises.
[9:37] Latte Littlething: Nice talking with you all. Il faut aller voir.
[9:37] Nepal Bergamasco: Leading India and continuously leading those 1-month fast and upholding non-violence although the whole country was in chaos, having my family and core supporters were important in my mission
[9:38] Latte Littlething: Nepal, how did their support aid you in your work?
[9:39] Nepal Bergamasco: It was hard to lead the people to non-violence when the rest of the country was in chaos. However, having supporters during the Salt March where we walked and fasted for a month, it helped me realize that there are people with the same passion and dream for India.
[9:40] You: Leaders are able to think outside the bow. They are creative in ways to approach things.
[9:40] You: box**
[9:40] Nepal Bergamasco: Having people to lead with the same goals as me made the already difficult situation a little easier to accomplish.
[9:40] Latte Littlething: I see, your passions acted as a ripple, and collided with others all over India.
Avatar Discussion 2, Group 5:
[9:45] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it's great to be talking to you today
[9:45] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: thank you for coming
[9:46] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: first of all, i am true proponent of equality
[9:46] You: thanks you
[9:46] Alaina Felisimo: I think leaders promote diversity through their actions and their words.
[9:46] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i base my philanthropic work on that idea
[9:46] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i opened a school in Africa for women
[9:46] You: I think a leader has to be diversity mided to properly empathize
[9:46] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i agree
[9:46] You: people are diverse, therefore a leader must realize this
[9:47] You: what's good for one is not always good for all
[9:47] Alaina Felisimo: I agree. It is important for a leader to accept others ideas while still maintaining their own opinions.
[9:47] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i have to do that in my show
[9:47] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i have to respect my guests
[9:47] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it's key to allowing others to identify with me
[9:47] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i am a "celebrity" even though i dont like that word
[9:47] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: but i use it to my advantage to draw attention to diversity
[9:47] You: but you use your celebrity
[9:48] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: for example, i have a book club
[9:48] Alaina Felisimo: I think that when someone has experienced many things in their lives, they will be more open to diversity.
[9:48] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: and i pick books with cultural messages
[9:48] Alaina Felisimo: I respect you for that.
[9:48] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i try to educate people about diversity to combat ignorance
[9:48] You: diversity is how we grow culturally because of the exposure to different thoughts
[9:49] You: are you speaking strictly of racial diversity?
[9:49] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: and gender
[9:49] Alaina Felisimo: Whether they should be or not, celebrities are some of the most influential people and should promote what they believe in.
[9:49] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i try to work with female African Americans
[9:49] You: It is a celebrity’s right to be indifferent though
[9:49] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: but that doesn’t mean I don’t have attention for other races and genders
[9:49] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: I believe in gay rights
[9:49] You: you also work with Tom Cruise lol
[9:49] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: I did
[9:49] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: that was interesting
[9:49] Alaina Felisimo: What do you do in Africa?
[9:49] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: I had to be open minded
[9:49] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: for that interview
[9:49] You: how do you feel about scientology
[9:50] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: one Christmas i sent toys over there
[9:50] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i even went to deliver it with my best friend gale
[9:50] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i also opened a leadership academy gor girls in south Africa
[9:50] You: and feel free to speak candidly, tho this isn't off the record
[9:50] Alaina Felisimo: I AM Catholic and follow the laws of the Catholic Church but I am able to respect others beliefs.
[9:50] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it's great to respect other religions
[9:50] You: how can a catholic support a sexual devient
[9:51] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: you learn so much that way
[9:51] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: education is very important to leadership
[9:51] You: Despite their disalignment with my life, I am baptist
[9:51] Alaina Felisimo: I have become more accepting of other people in the recent years because of my daughter who is gay. She has taught me a lot.
[9:52] You: but Oprah Shabooty, how do you feel about scientology in particular and what is it like to be around such strong proponents of many different ideas
[9:52] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i try to stay grounded to my beliefs
[9:52] You: do you ever pick and choose from appealing philosophies?
[9:52] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i accept them as i do with opinions and nothing more
[9:52] You: to create your own ideology
[9:52] Alaina Felisimo: I think religion is somehow all interlinked.
[9:53] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i dont pass judgment unles it is warranted
[9:53] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: especially those dealing with social awareness
[9:53] Alaina Felisimo: Even though not all churches, share the same ideas, they all believe in a higher power.
[9:53] You: i agree, but it's always important to understand the circumstance
[9:53] Alaina Felisimo: The circumstance of what?
[9:53] You: except the church of atheism
[9:53] You: the circumstances of people's situations. For example
[9:54] Alaina Felisimo: Well atheism means they don’t believe in a higher power, so is it really a church?
[9:54] You: we shouldn't look at a homeless person and judge what they did in their past that got them there. It is not our right, nor does it help to get to the future
[9:54] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i'm seeking to deviate from the topic a bit, because i dont think i would be doing my job if i didnt ask this question
[9:55] You: similarly, I may not give a starving alocoholic money because I understand his or her problem
[9:55] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: how does diversity contribute to your leadership role?
[9:55] You: I would instead give them food
[9:55] Alaina Felisimo: I think people should be able to believe what they want to believe and leader should work towards what they want.
[9:56] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i believe diversity motivates me
[9:56] You: diversity helps us understand that we need many labels for people, but that those labels are not important beyond descriptors
[9:56] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it motivates me to hold episodes drawing attention to a plethora of issues
[9:56] You: We have to be diversity minded as diverse individuals
[9:56] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: diversity isnt just about race or gender but about thoughts too
[9:56] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: ideas
[9:56] Alaina Felisimo: I am a lawyer and I deal with many different types of people with different circumstances. I need to be able to relate to them and understand their situation before I can help fix it.
[9:56] You: very true
[9:56] You: cultural diversity is a huge barrier
[9:57] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it's so difficult to understand all cultures
[9:57] You: but acceptance doesn't rule out dissent
[9:57] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: but what we can do is just try to learn as much
[9:57] Alaina Felisimo: I think ideas and beliefs are some of the things people have the hardest time accepting.
[9:57] Alaina Felisimo: I think it is easier to understand a culture once you have experienced it.
[9:57] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: why do you think that Alaina?
[9:58] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: oh i see
[9:58] You: people need to be willing to let go of their beliefs for understanding sake, especially with religion
[9:58] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it's true...that's why i travel a lot
[9:58] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i think i am luckier in that i am given that opportnity
[9:58] You: it all comes back to empathy and understanding the circumstance
[9:58] Alaina Felisimo: Because people are very set in their ways and do not like accepting that their are other ideas out there.
[9:58] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it just seems that I guess its not people's fault if they're not given the opportunity to experience diversity
[9:58] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: and therefore don’t understand it
[9:59] Alaina Felisimo: I think that a true leader seeks opportunities to experience diversity.
[9:59] You: there is diversity everywhere. It is about growing as a person from learning about people rather than forcing others to conform to you
[9:59] Alaina Felisimo: They go outside of their comfort zone and break barriers.
[9:59] You: I think leaders happen upon diversity without seeking it out
[9:59] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: sorry, but who is Heidi
[9:59] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: she's annoying me
[9:59] You: leaders are those for whom
[9:59] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: cuz she keeps typing
[10:00] Alaina Felisimo: I do not see a Heidi.
[10:00] You: neither do i
[10:00] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: she's likea ghost to me then
[10:00] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: that's freaky
[10:00] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: but i am open to her
[10:00] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i accept her
[10:00] You: nice save
[10:00] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: haha
[10:00] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: anyway
[10:00] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: yes,
[10:00] You: that sounds a little disingenuous
[10:00] You: not gonna lie
[10:00] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it's good that you're honest
[10:00] Alaina Felisimo: I disagree with that. A leader should want to explore other realms of thought and want to seek out diversity whenever they can.
[10:01] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: honesty is a good trait in a leader
[10:01] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: wait, what do you disagree with alaina?
[10:01] You: it's not that they don't want to explore, it's that the diversity isn't an adverse issue because they bridge people together by default
[10:01] Alaina Felisimo: A person who is more cultured and diverse will be able to relate to more types of people and be a better leader.
[10:01] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: but sometimes it's difficult for people to do it
[10:01] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: they're not thrust into that chance
[10:02] You: true
[10:02] Alaina Felisimo: They cannot bridge people together without understanding who they are or what they want or need first.
[10:02] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: for example, children living in poverty stricken africa
[10:02] Alaina Felisimo: and..
[10:02] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: dont know anything outside of their village, let a lone a whole world of different people
[10:02] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it's unfortunate, but i seek to change that with books
[10:02] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i let them know that there is so much more to life than just death
[10:02] Alaina Felisimo: well I guess it’s all circumstantial
[10:03] You: we have established the need for empathy and understanding, but for the leaders, we often can set ourselves to their example. With the impovershed of africa, they are leaders in their own right by their great desire for knowledge
[10:03] You: I've never seen any group of kids so excited to go to school
[10:03] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it's amazing isnt it?
[10:03] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it makes me cry
[10:03] You: as those at your leadership academy
[10:03] Alaina Felisimo: one can be a leader within the community by recognizing and caring for the needs of their people.
[10:03] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: education was so important in my life
[10:04] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: battling racism was so important when i was a child
[10:04] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: and to fuse all these into a school is absolutely breathtaking for me
[10:04] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: and i feel great pride in it
[10:04] You: education teaches us that we need diffences to exist and progress
[10:04] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i was born in america, but my place is also africa
[10:04] Alaina Felisimo: you should.
[10:04] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: oh absolutely
[10:04] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: if we were all a homogenous society
[10:05] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: how would we know to do anything differently?
[10:05] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: conformists are just afraid to be different
[10:05] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: differences shouldnt be put down with sham
[10:05] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: e
[10:05] Alaina Felisimo: I was born in America and fought in the Vietnam war and traveled a lot so I have been exposed to so many different places that I feel like a fusion of all of their cultures.
[10:05] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i know people who are ashamed of their race
[10:05] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: and it is sad
[10:06] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: differences are what make us who we are
[10:06] Alaina Felisimo: I think a leader makes people feel proud of who they are by respecting them and being proud of who they are.
[10:06] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: my diversity allowed me to get where i am in life
[10:06] You: it's sad that socially it's still an issue. Even the best leaders are not entirely blind to differences
[10:06] Alaina Felisimo: Every leader has flaws.
[10:06] Alaina Felisimo: But they use them to their advantage.
[10:06] You: but diverse groups need to have a voice to get their interests represented
[10:07] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: my power as a woman and african american allowed me to get me where i am
[10:07] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: and now i draw attention to issues pertaining to them...that's what i contribute
[10:07] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: my flaws allow me to relate to my guestst and my viewers
[10:07] Alaina Felisimo: I think people possess a lot of respect for diverse leaders because you know they have to work harder to get to where they are.
[10:07] You: By all appearances I am an upper-middle class white male living in America, which makes me unaware normally of minorities
[10:07] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: so they dont think that i'm some goddess...i'm just a normal person
[10:08] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: born the same way as you and you
[10:08] You: however, being gay I am thrust into a minority that must face persecution along with all the others
[10:08] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i was born into rural poverty and was admitted into a predominantly white school
[10:08] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: which is just silly
[10:08] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i feel sorry
[10:08] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i empathize
[10:08] You: people born into minority roles I believe make better leaders because of their understanding
[10:09] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: people use to speculate my gay relationship with my bff gale
[10:09] You: mos def, but it's your perrogative
[10:09] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: and although i love her dearly and i support gay rights, i hate it when people lie and publish falsities
[10:09] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: it just adds to the ignorance of not understanding and not being openminded
[10:09] Alaina Felisimo: Being from a small town, people often though I would take over the family lumber business, but I have surpassed their expectations and made a name for myself.
[10:10] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: to solve the problem of the world
[10:10] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: is to open up
[10:10] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: is to accept diversity
[10:10] You: agreed
[10:10] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: is to accept everything, not to agree
[10:10] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: i love talking to you all
[10:10] You: agree to accept, not agree
[10:10] Shabootyflonclaya Miklos: thank you for coming
[10:10] You: it's an honor
[10:10] Alaina Felisimo: An understanding Diversity leads to greater leadership and the ability to relate to others ultimately resulting in achieving more things.
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