[1]My Father and Me Neches River Festival 2007.
An artist’s work typically begins with a sketch, a preliminary black and white drawing, giving the essential features without including all of the details. As the artist’s idea develops and evolves, color begins to penetrate the imagination and seep onto the page. The artist mixes a variety of shades on his palette to ultimately produce a coherent piece of work. Similar to this relationship between black and white and technicolor, our experiences in Second Life transformed our role models from ideal archetypes in Project One into real people in Project Two, as we began to discover and emulate them. We absorbed experience from all of our encounters and eventually reached a point of new appreciation and understanding for our role models and each other. In Disney’s movie Brother Bear, the Spirit Voices say “Everything will become clear to you when you see things through another's eyes... whatever's meant for you, you will find [1]”. Much like in this movie when the warrior Kenai is transformed into a bear, we, ourselves, were converted into our role models and were given the opportunity to view life from another perspective. Becoming my father allowed me to identify the admirable characteristics that we both shared and strive to develop them within myself. By discovering these attributes, putting them into action, and writing about them, I was provided with insight into my relationship with my father and began to see his true colors. Thus, through Projects One and Two, I was able to connect with my father and begin the process of composing my new self through forming a unique and inseparable bond by intertwining our thoughts and making them one.
Although I have always been Daddy’s little girl, writing Project One enabled me to see and comprehend my father in a new light. Instead of just seeing him as my Dad and role model, I began to see him as a significant leader in the community and in society at large. While I have always admired his loving nature and constant drive to accomplish everything he desires along with his unending enthusiasm for and devotion to his family, friends, and community, I had never really considered the possibility of him being a role model to anyone else but myself.
[2]Hubert Oxford IV, Lila Oxford, Hubert Oxford V, and Hubert Oxford III
As I was forced to bring all of his marvelous features to the surface, I began to realize what a truly wonderful man he is. Not only is he courageous and successful, but he is also gentle, charismatic and inspiring. He always encouraged me to follow my dreams, no matter the cost and this is the most important lesson of all. Each trait that I focused on acted as a mirror in which I could catch a quick glimpse at my own image and remember the things I wished to imitate. By identifying these commendable characteristics in my father, I was able to piece together a definition of what I thought a leader should be and began to recognize some of these attributes within myself. Throughout his life my father has met struggles with optimism and has passionately strived to be all that he can be. His accomplishments are a reflection of his unwavering determination and drive, his incredible intelligence, and his clever zeal. Because of his strict discipline and dedication that he learned in the Corps at Texas A&M and his ability to solve problems with ease from his engineering background, he was promoted to Judge Advocate during the Vietnam War. As he courageously served his country, he traveled the world and experienced the diversity that it had to offer.
[3]My Father in his Kilt, beaming of Scottish pride.
He lived across seas for years and was able to indulge in his Scottish heritage and to accumulate a fusion of the various cultures he experienced to become quite a cultivated person. His charismatic presence and pleasant personality won him many companions throughout his travels and presented him with unlimited opportunities. Thus, his risks in his early life paved the way for success in his future. Today, my father has not only won abundant awards and esteem in the community, but he has also been named one of the best lawyers in the United States. Over the years, the Bible has implanted the importance of love and family in his life and he has strived to make them his top priorities.
[4]My Dad is the ideal family man and does everything in his power to make his children happy. Pictured here are my Mom, my sisters Gabriella and Adriana, my Dad, and Me.
He lives his daily life with a firm conviction to his faith and his beliefs while maintaining the composure needed in the business world. He constantly gives back to the community by participating in programs such as Bicycles and Bibles and the Beaumont Foundation and continues to transform the world one life at a time with his endless compassion for others. Although he has been met with countless struggles such as raising seven children and battling prostate cancer, he has overcome them with confidence and resolve, casting a ray of hope on all those around him. He looks to the future with anticipation and fortitude and lives each day to its fullest potential without ever looking back. Through writing about my Dad in Project One, I have come to see that individuality should be celebrated in everyone and that it is what makes us different that will ultimately make us great leaders and give us success in this life.
Furthermore, Second Life provided my fellow classmates and me with the opportunity to become our role models and see the world through their eyes. In Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird, Atticus Finch says to his daughter Scout, “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view...until you climb into his skin and walk around in it [2]" (Lee 1960,36). Through Second Life, we were not only turned into our role model’s physical persona, but also actively participated in living life as them. Their past became our present and through their experiences and beliefs, we were able to penetrate and explore other realms of thought that we never thought possible.
[5]My Avatar of my father, Hubert Oxford III
With all of my father’s qualities that I wished to emulate in mind, I set out on my adventure to create him mind, body, and soul in Second Life. Each change I made to his personal features made him seem even more alive and I began to feel a connection to him like I had never felt before. Our souls were united and our hearts beat as one whilst we simultaneously molded each other. Although I have known my father my entire life and have been an active participant in his, I never completely understood him until this experience forced me to become him and leap into his mind. His thoughts were mine, and mine were his. It was as if I was stuck in a trancelike state between fiction and reality. As our thoughts united, I began to recognize the similarities between us and reconstruct my character to match his. By trying to think how he would think, my innermost thoughts resurfaced and I was able to simultaneously interpret and separate the ones that we both shared. Actually taking on my father’s identity instilled me with a willingness to experience new sensations and become more vulnerable to accepting his ideas and the views of others. My father never told “me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it [3]” (Clarence Kelland). Thus, similar to in my real life, portraying him in Second Life enabled me to grow through example.
The Second life experience was very eye opening for me, and writing about it in Project Two allowed me to make connections that I had never considered before. “Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world [4]”, but Second life made me take a walk in my father’s shoes and realize that there are infinite possibilities beyond what I could ever imagine (Arthur Schopenhauer). Incorporating my ideas from Project One into Project Two was quite challenging, but the same theme of better understanding my father remained consistent throughout the two projects and united them. Communication between Avatars served as a driving force behind much of Project Two and through discovery learning, we were able to determine more about each other’s identities and actually grasp the concepts of Second Life.
[6]First Group Discussion on what the definition of a leader is. This conversation helped me form by own ideas on what being a leader entails.
Several Key elements such as passion, drive, and character seemed to guide the conversation and lead us in producing even more insightful ideas on what being a leader entails. We continually stressed the importance of a leader’s “ability to make everyone feel united towards a goal…and to want to pursue it together [5]” while still maintaining a courteous relationship with his supporters (Danielle Oxford, Avatar Chat, comment posted October 4, 2007, 9:21). Also, a great emphasis was put on a leader’s ability to form his own opinions without conforming to those of society and to express and live these ideas in his everyday life. Furthermore, from the second conversation we were able to see that leadership and diversity are closely interlinked.
[7]Second Group Avatar Discussion on the relationship between leadership and diversity. By realizing the importance of this connection, I will now be able to become a stronger leader.
Leaders are able to promote diversity through their actions and words. They are capable of seeing things from another’s point of view and empathize and show compassion for their positions. Another idea that appeared frequently throughout this discussion was that the more experiences with diversity that a leader has had in his life, the more he will be able to relate to others and understand their situations. I also came to the conclusion that a leader does not wait for diversity to find him, he “seeks opportunities to experience diversity” and in doing so “go(es) outside of (his) comfort zone (to) break barriers [6]” for everyone (Danielle Oxford, Avatar Chat, comment posted October 4, 2007 ([9:59]). By participating in such dialogue and listening to others, my classmates and I ultimately took on leadership roles ourselves. It was interesting to see how reading and writing played a key role in the development of our role models. As we read each other’s opinions, and responded to them, we were able to connect through the expression of our ideas and combine our personal beliefs with those of our role models to develop a unique integration of thought and inspiration. Great leaders seem to have the ability to take ideas from materials they have read and put them into action, and this active learning process allowed us to take on this role. By better understanding what a leader is through Project Two, I was able to identify the type of leader I want to become and see it actively portrayed through the embodiment of my father.
Additionally, our Avatar chat paralleled Walter Jackson Bate’s definition of the sympathetic imagination. He states in “The Sympathetic Imagination in Eighteenth-Century English Criticism” that in order to truly understand an object, one must “actually (enter) into the object…to secure a momentary but complete identification with it [7]” (144-46). Thus, by dwelling as my father in Second Life, I was essentially taking part in his existence. As I delved into my father’s mind and produced his definition of leadership, we became a cohesive entity of expression. Because of this feeling of harmony, I believe I was more successful in translating my father’s leadership experience into words and relating this knowledge to how he acted as a leader throughout his life. Although I did not always interact in the discussion exactly how he would, I think I was able to capture the nature of his spirit and impart his beliefs to others. It was exhilarating to “throw (my) soul into the body of another man, and be at once possessed of his sentiments, adopt his passions, and rise to all the functions and feelings of his situation [8]” (Bate 144-46).
While I have learned a lot about my leadership role from illustrating and portraying my father in Projects One and Two, my peers have also paved the way to greater understanding of the meaning of leadership. Their influence has been just as strong as my father’s and my own. As A. Bartlett Giametti says, “The journey of education is lifelong; it began in your family and in your place of worship and in your earlier schools and in the spaces of your soul that are yours alone…[9]” and will continue to expand and be shaped by others throughout our lives, until the day we die (128). During the Avatar conversations, I was presented with ideas that had never crossed my mind and was challenged to interpret their meanings.
[8]Me typing and communicating with my classmates during one of the Avatar Discussions.
With role models from different backgrounds and time periods all participating at once in the conversations, I was able to see that the idea of a leader has pretty much transcended time and is a universal concept. From Gandhi, to John Lennon, to Johnny Depp, to members of people’s families, each role model was unique and inspirational in their own way and provided their own insight into the conversations. Not only did my peers show me how to become a better leader through Second Life, but they also took the initiative to critique me in SWORD and make me a better leader through my writing in real life. Through their examples of leadership, I was able to further expand upon my construction of character that I began when I became my father in avatar form.
Just as Katherine Mansfield said, "By understanding myself, I better understand others and by understanding others, I better understand myself [10]”. Through the completion of Projects One, Two, and Three, I have discovered not only a new connection and appreciation of my father, but also a new person within myself that is ready to greet the world. Jumping into my father’s skin and observing the world through his eyes, provided me with more insight into who he was and allowed me to catch a glimpse at the bond that exists between us. Although our encounters were merely in a virtual world, I was still ignited with a sense of understanding and esteem for my Father that I believe will never be put out. That is how learning works. One suddenly understands something that they understood their entire life, but in a new way. It was really quite gratifying to realize that someone who I looked up to and admired so much was actually a great deal like me and had already had such a huge impact on my life. I now believe that the same is true for all role models. People try to become and emulate those that they admire because they see some unique part of themselves within their role models and only hope that they will someday amount to who they are by following in their footsteps. My Father is everything I want to amount to be and a little bit more. I only hope that I will one day be able to live the kind of life that he has lived while benefiting from all of the leadership capabilities he has endowed upon me. At the end of the day, Hubert Oxford III is my father, and I am his daughter and I am satisfied knowing that this is the most extraordinary and irreplaceable connection present in the world. My father has accomplished a great deal in his life and I look forward to the day that I will be able to live up to the legacy that he has left behind.
[9]Dad and me in the Hall of Mirrors at Versailles. With one last glimpse behind us, we head into the future.
Word Count: 2, 512
Photo Citations:
[1]- Dad and Me Neches River Festival:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyVoiBb8xkSowGBF2x2eRPJnn-wq-CEZb-4MTrfVH3sSVcu3mxfPXfAOdXpS_KbZ0tzxR9BgIKL2v1LmDNJWx7-8GPTrRI9Utp-P-8XNQRtgQOdQEVNyonXSDO2P4OpQ92eba11P9XFlg/s600-h/n1516410112_30071503_3485.jpg
[2]-Grandfather: - https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3U74f3nYZhHhRSz8zQaoI0TP1P0_PM6d4F0OXdXznVzXcvMdlmLB3GBzA_ezGz_SDV0GWjlFfWEHqrfZPV1xUANq_Vj82rhI7oMqY8pkk_Ig-p57tcqz-0jfVty6GIdZKoXA12_xCVHo/s600-h/Grandfather.png
[3]- Kilt:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGqMOQyaRdVemoZ91Z5hRxZ5n-Ev11MR5pDDFgLJls-JAjhoUjV2JRfI8E24HJ3kL2icQMjRhYcrcn-Jqb0nkobr68Qy1VCOUqMUj-Q2bgPh7d3SJFL3DKBnqbk8bnVojFgLwsTpJkMEs/s1600-h/kilt.png
[4]- Totem Pole:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1wKl_8XimZM1TGMvAJFu8hh79NbAgN0VQfyEYgFUIt2ja0UPnnZBRZjL0323nsDrfK_QoIfUCZoOzeYxH030arJ-ZYV4LolMszXTwGAj2dNh48Pd0cz9J84rWnjAUOcT-LVFyAbq4JbU/s1600-h/n1516410165_30100613_4424.jpg
[5]- Avatar:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxzleYZnXrBknwzgxgUbE7OE9CEv3CzmETr4LeRnkaqjgoIWIDhUyD34RmKQJmoGA2S3uofzw2T8wUhRGi_1-sERwaL8A-TwaA2xxN4PmyidR_CDRPCS0sNHq-QZ817Wd5CfIqr71BCfg/s1600-h/Rm1_002.bmp
[6]- Group Discussion One:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgn72isX8NBHQVzDCiPQZrudTdQrrDPYpghyphenhyphen9zYC1xF5jn5dxD0W5thxtN3MZ2lnB60UwlV33asNgdTJCDmJNIEd69pePPr84cywg5H9MyDR-TxjRAgQcwOJOUSFQaZp1t4urHYjLcOz4U/s1600-h/1.jpg
[7]- Group Discussion Two:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgum9amV5_IJIN94BOWnMBd2t0zHO3R-_Cd4ZJ3eJjNurwCduxdmo2aHsVh-3FwLn3oFH4q50F0JHEBuIsefwr4OVOyDGo145N8IwuedP7UDADK65gngDQJfRIEND2e-Qzcw-k6DMP1CA8/s1600-h/5B.jpg
[8]-Danielle, Crystal, Ryan:
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyJw2UueFtaxQZjaRVJFk5znuVIWtYAxg1401EBb_cNzEbinxedI3tjv6Jb2bCn3pArR5Hy7qCH6_Kr2Bj5BbBz-NCDCNKJcJDUtnAS70RQyE1-9WwvyeQXyCbXxX-B21ln1_R7EeFBWI/s1600-h/DanielleCrystalRyan.jpg
[9]- Hall of Mirrors
https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfknX1GxMMNBi59AMmbktx7DtzIix9psrug6p1ZxwTEfg4KfDE86hBmja5EzhkPd_tNNb60NNOxLDhVWc3TwkS1hxww04wFdj5-PTKYQucezdN1lRdp5P2AtlWSYozGSo0B7iNSZN7-a4/s1600-h/hall+of+mirrors.png
Text Citations:
[1]- Brother Bear, DVD, directed by Aaron Blaise and Robert Walker (Orlando, Fl: Walt Disney Feature Animation, 2003).
[2]-Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird (New York: J. B. Lippincott, 1960), 36.
[3]- Clarence Kelland. Steve Brunkhorst, “15 Unforgettable Father Quotes.” Ezine Articles, http://ezinearticles.com/?15-Unforgettable-Father-Quotes&id=141974 (accessed October 16, 2007).
[4]- Arthur Schopenhauer. Jone Johnson Lewis, “Wisdom Quotes.”
http://www.wisdomquotes.com/
[5]- Danielle Oxford, Avatar Discussion 1, Group 1, [9:21].
[6]- Danielle Oxford, Avatar Discussion 2, Group 5, [9:59].
[7]- “The Sympathetic Imagination in Eighteenth-Century English Criticism” by Walter Jackson Bate ELH, Vol. 12, No. 2 (Jun., 1945), pp. 144-164. http://www.cwrl.utexas.edu/~bump/sympathetic%20imagination.html
[8]- “The Sympathetic Imagination in Eighteenth-Century English Criticism” by Walter Jackson Bate ELH, Vol. 12, No. 2 (Jun., 1945), pp. 144-164. http://www.cwrl.utexas.edu/~bump/sympathetic%20imagination.html
[9]- A. Bartlett Giametti, Composition and Reading in World Literature (Texas: Jerome Bump, 2007).
[10]-Katherine Mansfield. Dr. Mardy, “Dr. Mardy's Quotes of the Week -- January 9-15, 2005.” http://64.233.167.104/search?q=cache:KhDjaqx1CsUJ:www.chiasmus.com/archive/msg00210.html+katherine+mansfield+By+understanding+myself,+I+better+understand+others+and+by+understanding+others,+I+better+understand+myself&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=us (accessed October 16, 2007).
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